Thivashini Sivakumar: I’m Back!
Hey Thivashini, it’s been a while since we last saw you on the field. How have you been and how are you feeling these days?
First of all, thank you for having me for this interview. I’m feeling really good, even better than before, to be honest. It’s been a journey, but I’m definitely in a much better place now.
It’s been over a year since your ACL injury. During your recovery and rehab, were there any moments when you considered quitting or thought about stopping football altogether?
Oh, absolutely. There were so many moments when I felt like giving up. I felt left behind at times, and there were instances when I thought, “Maybe football isn’t for me.” I hit rock bottom, and I honestly wanted to quit. I’d cry myself to sleep almost every night. But my parents, especially my father, played a huge role in helping me push through. Their unwavering support kept me going, and that’s how I managed to find the strength to fight through it.
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You’re well-known for your speed and agility, especially your ability to turn and change direction quickly. After being sidelined for such a long time, do you have any concerns about losing those abilities? How have you been mentally coping with the uncertainty of returning to your full potential?
I was really concerned about my abilities, no doubt. I kept worrying that I might lose everything I’d worked for—that I might not get a chance to play on a team again or participate in any state leagues. I knew I had to work extra hard, especially to regain my confidence. So I focused on training, and slowly but surely, I started regaining not just my physical abilities but also my confidence. That helped ease a lot of the worry I had.
During your recovery, was there anyone who supported or inspired you that you’d like to thank? Also, do you have any advice for other players going through a similar injury?
Without a doubt, my parents were there for me every step of the way. From day one, especially my father, they never left my side. We tried to seek financial support from various associations, but we were met with closed doors. It felt like a betrayal at the time. But my father reassured me, told me everything would be okay, and worked overtime, often sacrificing sleep, to earn the extra money I needed for rehabilitation. Their sacrifices mean everything to me, and I owe them so much. To anyone going through a similar injury, I’d say: Injuries come out of nowhere, in an instant. It’s tough, but trust that everything you’re going through is building you into a stronger version of yourself. Believe in your abilities, even when it feels impossible. It’s okay to slow down, take your time, and allow yourself space to heal—physically and mentally. You will get your moment to shine.
This season, you’ll be making your return to the field with MBPJ in the FASWSL. What are your expectations for this season? And with the SEA Games coming up later this year, are you aiming to secure a spot on the national team?
This is my first time playing in the FASWSL, and I’m genuinely excited about it. My goal for the season is, of course, to win the trophy with the team. I truly believe MBPJ has the talent and potential to make that happen. Personally, I’m just focusing on playing as much football as I can, having fun, and enjoying the game. While making the national team is not my main focus this year, I’m open to the opportunity should it come my way. Right now, it’s all about playing and enjoying the journey.
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Looking beyond football, do you have any personal goals or aspirations you plan to achieve off the field this year?
Off the field, I’m aiming to achieve a few personal goals this year. First, I want to get my driver’s license, and I also plan to enroll in a university. On top of that, I want to continue focusing on both my physical and mental health. Now that I’m back on track, I don’t want to rush things or get overwhelmed. It’s about finding balance and making sure I’m in the right space to give my best, both on and off the field.
To wrap up the interview, if you could choose your ideal 5-a-side team made up of local women footballers, who would make the cut?
For my ideal 5-a-side team, I’d go with Azurin as my goalkeeper. She’s extremely reliable and has incredible reflexes. In defense, I’d choose Siti and Wana—they’re both rock-solid and dependable at the back. In midfield, I’d pick Farahiyah. She has great control of the game, creates chances, and is always composed on the ball. For the attack, I’d go with Khaleeda. She’s quick, skillful, and knows how to finish. Together, this team would be really balanced and tough to break down.